Sex and Dating, Superhuman Style – Part 7

Looks like some Kryptonian marriages begin the way that many Earth marriages end.

Dude, you suck at writing your own vows.

This display of brutal honesty courtesy of Action Comics #307 (December 1963) by Leo Dorfman and Jim Mooney.

Strange Moments in Video Gaming – Part 4

What kind of knight makes time with his fair princess in a graveyard? In his underwear?

"Fair princess, mine codpiece doth chafe in thy presence."

You know, I’d gladly chalk this up to an innocent misunderstanding, but given the kind of information the sequel to the above game volunteers to us about the fair Guinevere. a.k.a. Princess Prin Prin…

"Canst thou convert thy measurements to the metric system?"

…I’m suddenly feeling much less generous when it comes to giving them the benefit of the doubt.

Ghosts’n Goblins and Ghouls’n Ghosts are copyrights and trademarks of Capcom Co., Ltd.

Pac-Land Inflation and Recession

Things’re tough everywhere, apparently. The price of a game of Pac-Man has risen to three bucks, the eponymous hero is subletting one of Ms. Pac-Man‘s mazes, pellets are being rationed, and Blinky and Inky are out of a job.

Pac-Man is a copyright and trademark of Namco Ltd.

Certifiable Insanity, Nintendo Power Style

Nearly twenty years ago, in Nintendo Power – Volume 52 (September 1993), I was issued the following challenge:

Bah! In my day, we didn't use Warp Zones! We just gritted our teeth and played all the way through to the end, dammit! 😛

I decided to answer that challenge – with a rental copy, no less – and, true to their word, this was my reward:

This should help quite nicely with my insanity defense.

And, just in case anyone’s wondering about whether or not this is the real deal, I present you with the following letter of authentication:

So now I'm a Power Player and a Certified Mario Maniac? Awesome! 🙂

Failure to Communicate

It’s amazing how even the most innocent of comments can be twisted into something they’re not.

We need a new Martian-Venusian translator and fast.

Today’s breakdown in male-female communications has been brought to you by Student Council Staff Members (生徒会役員共/Seitokai Yakuindomo) – Volume 1 (August 12, 2008) by Tozen Ujiie.

The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword

Especially in the hands of Batman.

Don't tell me. I don't ever want to know where that pen's been.

This sadistically creative use of a writing utensil has been brought to you by JLA: Welcome to the Working Week (2003) by Patton Oswalt, Patrick Gleason, and Christian Alamy.

Strange Moments in Video Gaming – Part 3

If you’re facing a giant boss in a shoot ’em up, there are many acceptable targets: head, eyes, mouth, heart, and hands, just to name a few. But there are certain lines that shouldn’t be crossed.

Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes!

I said the eyes! THE EYES! THOSE AREN'T EYES!

This lesson in fighting dirty courtesy of Sexy Parodius by Konami.