Posts Tagged ‘Jay Garrick’

Christmas Overdrive

2014/12/22

If you think the anticipation and anxiety that regular people experience during the holiday season is bad, imagine having to go through it while possessing the power of super-speed.

Some needs to reduce their caffeine and/or sugar intake. :P

Some needs to reduce their caffeine and/or sugar intake. 😛

This year’s Christmas jitters have been brought to you by Flash #73 (February 1993) by Mark Waid, Greg LaRoque, and Roy Richardson.

The Generation Gap – Part 2

2013/08/04

There’s nothing like good old-fashioned superhero values.

I think it just comes with the territory, kid.

I think it just comes with the territory, kid.

Today’s etiquette lesson has been brought to you by JSA #19 (February 2001) by David S. Goyer, Geoff Johns, Alan Davis, Stephen Sadowski, Michael Bair, Keith Champagne, and Mark Farmer.

Studies in Douchebaggery – Part 1

2013/02/01

Griefing existed well before the advent of online video games.

Dude, just teabag his corpse and get it over with, you sore winner.

Man, just teabag Satan’s corpse and get it over with, you douche.

Today’s example of being a sore winner courtesy of Flash Comics #1 (January 1940) by Gardner F. Fox, John B. Wentworth, Ed Wheelan, Stan Ashmeier, Harry Lampart, Sheldon Mayer, Sheldon Moldoff, Dennis Neville, and George Storm.

The Generation Gap – Part 1

2011/11/15

When you have trouble dealing with those pesky, superpowered teenagers, let someone else handle it.

Considering that Flash doesn't have any kids and Sentinel has two, this doesn't really seem all that fair to me...

This example of senior citizen buck passing has been brought to you by Young Justice: Sins of Youth #1 (May 2000) by Peter David, Todd Nauck, and Lary Stucker.

The Universal Translator: Justice Society of America #44 (January 2011)

2010/12/27

While attempting to determine for himself the connection between an attack by the superpowered terrorist Scythe on the city of Monument Point and a World War II black ops raid on a Nazi laboratory in Libya that both he and the Golden Age Green Lantern were involved in, the Golden Age Flash asks the annoyingly cryptic (and incredibly decrepit) Senator Eagin a very pertinent question.

Congratulations, Senator. You’re an utter failure in TWO languages.

No, actually. No it’s not.

First of all, Senator Eagin presumably meant to say “Scythe is the English word for ‘Drachen’.” since the way he’s phrased his sentence here implies that “scythe” is a German word and “drachen” an English one when the exact opposite is true.

Second, “Drachen” has several possible translations. It’s the plural of “dragon”. It’s the proper German word for “kite” or “hang glider”. It’s a condescending slang term for a woman. But it sure as hell doesn’t mean “scythe”. The correct translation of that would be “Sense” (pronounced “sen-seh”).

On an unrelated note, I’m not normally this harsh on a new creative team – Justice Society of America #44 (January 2011) is only the second issue in Mark Guggenheim and Scott Kollins’ run on this title, after all – but their German language failure is matched only by their character interpretation failure. Turning the JSA, of all teams, grim and gritty? Twisting the normally level-headed, likable Jay Garrick into someone all too willing to consider murdering a child and a criminal? Seemingly suggesting that conscience and morality are weaknesses and that the state is infallible and should always be obeyed? Absolutely pathetic, people. Absolutely pathetic.


%d bloggers like this: