Remember: If you’re ever caught stealing office supplies, it’s important to act natural and quickly change the subject so the whole thing’ll blow over really fast.
Awkwardness averted. 🙂
Today’s theft prevention lesson has been sponsored by Captain Marvel #1 (January 2016) by Tara Butters, Michele Fazekas, Kris Anka, Mark Bagley, Drew Henessy, Adam Hughes, Frank Martin, and Marguerite Sauvage.
For everyone else reading this that’s alone this Valentine’s Day like me…this one’s for you. 😛
Being alone on Valentine’s Day isn’t the end of the world…oh, wait. 😦
This public service message has been brought to you by Ghostbusters II (1989).
Let it never be said that the Punisher‘s inconsiderate of the needs of others.
Yeesh, make up your mind, dude, he hasn’t got all day.
This humble request has been brought to you by The Punisher #1 (April 2000) by Garth Ennis, Steve Dillon, and Jimmy Palmiotti.
Remember when Wonder Woman committed identity theft in order to become an American citizen? Because I sure do.
I’m pretty sure that’s a felony.
This glimpse into one Amazon’s life of crime comes to you courtesy of DC Special Series #19: Secret Origins of Super-Heroes (Fall 1979) by Robert Bernstein, Otto Binder, E. Nelson Bridwell, Cary Burkett, John Broome, Gardner F. Fox, Edmond Hamilton, Robert Kanigher, Ross Andru, Jose Delbo, Ramona Fradon, Carmine Infantino, Joe Kubert, Al Plastino, Dick Sprang, George Tuska, Vince Colletta, Mike Esposito, Joe Giella, and Stan Kaye.
UPDATE (2016.07.31.): James Daily of the comic book legal blog Law and the Multiverse has classified this transaction as “pretty illegal”. You can read more about his thoughts on this here.
Alfred Pennyworth‘s acquainted with the classics. All of the classics.
And here I thought being able to tie a bow tie backwards, without looking, while driving a limo was impressive. 🙂
Today’s theatrical performance has been sponsored by Batman and Robin #20 (April 2011) by Peter J. Tomasi, Patrick Gleason, and Mick Gray.
You know, given how accident prone Arthur Curry was as a kid combined with how incompetent his parents were, I’m surprised that he lived to see four.
Yeah, he’s safe…no thanks to you two. 😛
These childhood-issues-to-come have been brought to you by Adventure Comics #260 (May 1959) by Robert Bernstein, Jerry Coleman, Lee Elias, Ramona Fradon, Stan Kaye, John Sikela, and Kurt Swan.
Man, petty crime in Gotham City is petty.
Don’t forget to steal his lunch money, too.
This shakedown has been brought to you by Batman #213 (July-August 1969) by E. Nelson Bridwell, Don Cameron, Bill Finger, David Vern Reed, Ross Andru, Bob Kane, Sheldon Moldoff, Jim Mooney, Win Mortimer, Lew Sayre Schwartz, Mark Esposito, Charles Paris, Jerry Robinson, and George Roussos.
If you thought parental pressure on regular children to succeed was bad, it’s infinitely worse when your kids have superpowers.
It’s not child abuse, it’s super child abuse.
Today’s example of extreme parenting comes to you courtesy of Adventure Comics #260 (May 1959) by Robert Bernstein, Jerry Coleman, Lee Elias, Ramona Fradon, Stan Kaye, John Sikela, and Kurt Swan.
It says something when, almost immediately after arriving in Man’s World, you decide to embrace capitalism and turn yourself into a sideshow attraction.
WARNING: Audience members in first three rows may be hit by ricocheting bullets.
This glimpse into Wonder Woman‘s employment history has been brought to you by DC Special Series #19: Secret Origins of Super-Heroes (Fall 1979) by Robert Bernstein, Otto Binder, E. Nelson Bridwell, Cary Burkett, John Broome, Gardner F. Fox, Edmond Hamilton, Robert Kanigher, Ross Andru, Jose Delbo, Ramona Fradon, Carmine Infantino, Joe Kubert, Al Plastino, Dick Sprang, George Tuska, Vince Colletta, Mike Esposito, Joe Giella, and Stan Kaye.
I guess “The Copyright Infringement Who Walks” didn’t have quite the same ring to it.
Today’s trademark violation comes to you courtesy of Sensation Comics #1 (January 1942) by Bill Finger, Gardner F. Fox, William Moulton Marston, Sheldon Moldoff, Charles Reizenstein, Jon L. Blummer, Irwin Hasen, Everett E. Hibbard, Harry G. Peter, and Howard Purcell.