Archive for the ‘Superman’ Category

Crowning Moments of Awesome – Part 3: Superman


“For the contingent out there who sneer at heroes like Superman and Wonder Woman and Captain America, those icons who still, at their core, represent selfless sacrifice for the greater good, and who justify their contempt by saying, oh, it’s so unrealistic, no one would ever be so noble… grow up. Seriously. Cynicism is not maturity, do not mistake the one for the other. If you truly cannot accept a story where someone does the right thing because it’s the right thing to do, that says far more about who you are than these characters.” – Greg Rucka

Given what happens in the movie Man of Steel, I think it’s time that someone reminded the world about why Superman doesn’t kill and making him grim and gritty is probably the greatest betrayal of everything the character’s come to stand for over the past 75 years. And I know of no better way to do that than the following scene from Action Comics #775 (March 2001) by Joe Kelly, Doug Mahnke, Lee Bermejo, Tom Nguyen, Dexter Vines, Jim Royal, Jose Marzan, Wade Von Grawbadger, and Wayne Faucher.


Superman Says The Darndest Things – Part 7


You know, I’d provide some context for this panel, but why ruin the Silver Age goofiness?

I wonder if Superman would come out looking like Will Smith if he used Dahr-Nel's machine?

I wonder if Superman would come out looking like Will Smith if he used Dahr-Nel’s machine?

Today’s bizarre example of Kryptonian medicine courtesy of Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane #106 (November 1970) by Robert Kanigher, Werner Roth, and Vince Colletta.

Presidential Assassination, DC Universe Style


You know that free pass Batman always seems to give to the Joker that allows the latter to keep on living no matter how terrible the things that he does are? It apparently doesn’t apply to Lex Luthor.

This is what happens when Batman puts the “dark” in “Dark Knight”.

This hypothetical scenario courtesy of Superman/Batman #5 (February 2004) by Jeph Loeb, Dexter Vines, and Ed McGuinness.

Comic Book Sexual Innuendo – Part 26


Strange were the ways of flirting and talking dirty back in the Silver Age.

She means the milk from the cow, Clark.

This unusual but welcome invitation has been brought to you by Superman #165 (November 1963) by Robert Bernstein, Al Plastino, Curt Swan, and George Klein.

Little Red Boxers Lost


Earlier this week, it was announced that Scott Lobdell would be taking over writing duties on the much-troubled Superman, which would make it the second time that creative team assigned to that title has changed since the New 52 started less than a year ago.

Since I’m not following it and DC titles are dropping from my pull list like flies, this doesn’t affect me in the slightest, but I found the following statement of Lobdell’s from an interview with The Huffington Post rather troubling:

“In fact, I am willing to say publically that if you adore Red Hood and The Outlaws (and, hey, who doesn’t?!)… you are going to love the little red boxers off of Superman!” – Scott Lobdell

I’m going to ignore the part about Red Hood and the Outlaws since I’ve already made my opinion on that particular topic very clear on this blog, but not the other half, for reasons that will soon become clear.

Scott, old chum(p), for the record, this is what the main character of your upcoming book looks like at present:

Boxers or briefs? Neither, apparently.

Superman’s “little red boxers” went the way of bell-bottom pants and acid-wash jeans when the DC Universe got rebooted last September. Unless, of course, you’re talking about your own personal underwear-wearing habits, in which case…too much information, dude.

Seriously, DC Comics…you assigned someone who doesn’t even know what your company’s flagship character currently looks like to write him? What the everloving hell?

Superman Says The Darndest Things – Part 6


Little known fact: one of Superman‘s lesser known powers is super-creepiness.

Trust me, you DON’T want to know where Superman’s other hand is in that second panel.

This semi-incestuous Kryptonian moment has been brought to you by Action Comics #289 (June 1962) by Leo Dorfman, Jerry Siegel, George Klein, Jim Mooney, Curt Swan, and Al Plastino.

Playing the Kryptonian Race Card


The Lex Luthor of Earth-23 really hates misconceptions about the nature of his irrational hatred of Superman.

Speciesist? Yes. Xenophobic? Yes. Racist? HELL NO.

This breakdown in interplanetary racial relations courtesy of Action Comics #9 (July 2012) by Grant Morrison, Gene Ha, Art Lyon, Rags Morales, and Brad Anderson.

Superman Says The Darndest Things – Part 5


Remember how I theorized that White Kryptonite might’ve affected Superman‘s brain last time around? Well, if it did, I don’t think it ever wore off.

Or maybe it’ll trigger the Kryptonian photic sneeze reflex and result in your BLOWING OUT THE SUN.

This leap of logic has been brought to you by DC Comics Presents #58 (June 1983) by Mike W. Barr, Curt Swan, and Dave Hunt.

Superman Says The Darndest Things – Part 4


If you listen closely, you’ll be able to make out the sound of thousands of high school biology teachers weeping in unison.

No, I think the White Kryptonite just made him super-dumb, actually.

This massive taxonomical fail has been brought to you by Action Comics #366 (August 1968) by Leo Dorfman, Ross Andru, Neal Adams, and Mike Esposito.

Superman Says The Darndest Things – Part 3


So Superman’s seen This Is Spinal Tap? Who knew?

I'm more surprised that he caught the MAGIC hammer WITHOUT SHATTERING EVERY BONE IN HIS GODDAMN HAND.

This gratuitous 80s movie reference has been brought to you by Avengers/JLA #2 of 4 (2003) by Kurt Busiek and George Pérez.

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